things are better off that way.

mama, you can sensed when im feeling sad. the way u looked at me.the way u stared at me. u can see it only in a glanced. when, i turned around to face you back. i can see you feeling there's something wrong with me. normally, you will asked what happened. but, maybe certain things we shouldn't discussed. like today,
i learned that in life you cant have everything your way. and normally i will cry and go emotionally on it. but, i think im getting mature and less childish.
i can even smile and say maybe its better to be friends. loving someone as friends are more powerful compare to others.
as long as, the relationship is there, i think i would be fine with it.
hugging you is the best medicine of all.
but hey ma, you should know that i didnt cry like i used too anymore.
seriously not like before, when my eyes gile gile gile like panda.
pergi sekolah pun malu. :)

p/s; thanks for telling the truth, i really do appreciate it. at least i know the reasons. :).
: thanks alot to my friends. gile caring korang. tgur tnye whether im okay or not. syg korang. :)

miss you guys~!!

im damn bored rite now. i can even cry. aiyoo. i dont want to spend my precious being 19 nites at home. arghh. i want excitement. not that gile2 one. just some fun late at night. arghh. what am i talking about. im a gal. in our tradition and culture gals are suppose to stay at home. i really hate onlining everynight. feeling like there's no fun in life. maybe, i just miss college's life.when you get to kacau people around you. talking late at night. watch movies together. gossiping. running up and down to chase people. spilling buckets of water to celebrate their birthdays. kena marah wif pak guard balik lambat. ( and im realli good at this.haha.). play truth or dare (haha, i didnt get the chance to complete my dare.haha.pity them. =).sleepovers.walking to the class( haha, seriously my college to faculty is damn far. selalu je kne maki bile jalan.thank god there's bus and cap.haha. syg pak cik cap. =).haha. makan ramai2. =). i miss kena suap. =).eating my fav ice cream ( sundae cornetto choc!. my fav. =). hehe, best, nuha selalu belanje.hehe. jahat kn sye. tp sye sgt syang awk~!=). sye rindu smua org~! seriously. sye rindu smua. korang baek sgt. ske dgr complaint, mnyalak, mrepek sye.haha. =). and sorry sgt sye suke jerit name org kuat2.haha, ske kenakn org. =).

p/s: korang slalu dihati.gile rindu. nk je nyanyi lagu uitm tue.haha. =)

no more braces

yeah, there's no more braces, but just only stupid retainer~! arghhh. =)

please dun feel sorry for me, im stronger than what you think.

IMY, IMY U ALOT I GUESS.
ALL I CAN DO IS JUST to STAND STILL AND HOPE FOR IT TO BE OVER.

slowly,slowly, time will come, i hope this emotion of mine will subside by itself.

p/s: there's story to tell u. im gonna open my braces this thursday. then, i need to suffer wearing a retainer plak.=). but, thank god when im in uni, there's no more braces.=).

brainstorming..

nabila, please think fast~!. u have only like until this sunday to decide on what to take for degree course. arghhh.. do i ever tell you that i hate making decisions???arghh. decide for me lar.. i barely can even sleep lately. all i can think of it was what im going to fill up for the upu second phase. yeah, its second phase. after this, there's no more changes. so, after i have decided it, i cant change and i need to live it for mybe another 40years. thats what mama said lar.haha. but, we can always change the plan.hehe. its easier to marry a rich guy.haha. then, i can shop till i drop all the time and travel around the world.. tp that path lgi susah nk tgk.haha. dah. dah. im starting to crap.. arghh.

i have two choices now- dentistry or medic?
i dont think i can do medic. im afraid things like surgery, cucuk cucuk stuff. and medic is like for the good students. why i said like this. you see kay, if your patient is about to die. you cant cry in front of that person and tell him/her that she's not going to live for a long time. how to do that? omg, karang i yg nanges dlu before telling that person. hurmm.

for dentistry plak, can i get datuk title for it? call me ambitious but i really damn want it~!. haha, other gals maybe prefer datin rather than datuk.but, i prefer datuk. to get it by urself will give you that satisfaction since you earn it by urself. =). dream on lar nabilailani~! haha, =)


to be continued
nabilailanihasgonecrazy. =)

keep me thinking.

why are we always fighting? when your not by my side, i always cry hoping your there. but, when we are near each other, there's always screaming, crying,fighting, and tensed between us. sometimes, i do wonder why you dont really see the real me. all you see is him. as if im not that vital to you. im a vulnerable and a sensitived person. when we're fighting im always in the verge of crying. it really hurts me deep down inside. so many times i've repeated that i hate repeating the same thing that i've already told you. maybe you dont see this. maybe you dont understand why im being like this. i dont like to repeat myself because i want your attention. you are a very important person in my life. i want you to always be there for me. i want you to always listen to all my stories. but, you only do that with him. who am i to you? maybe, we should just be far apart from each other. thats better i guess. the strained between us should end as fast as possible, i hope. im gonna try to keep my mouth shut, so that i wouldnt hurt you that much anymore.maybe, keeping it to myself is better comparing having to fight with you all the time. you must be tired of me i guess. dont worry, soon im gonna be gone. i will not bug u that often anymore. and when im away, i really hope deep down inside, you'll gonna miss me. =(.

missing you. =(

approximately at 2.45 a.m, i woke up from my dreamland.the first thing that is running through my mind is you. i think this is because that i miss you. i tried to search for you, but your not there. the only thing that i can do is wishing you to be there. all i can do is just cry. why am i being like this i dont know. maybe im scared of losing you. losing you from my mind is the worst of all. actually, there are alot of things that had happened today that i would like to share with you. i want to tell you that i really had fun today with my friends. even though, it started rough in the beginning,full of screaming and crying but i can still say that it turned out very smoothly in the end.we had alot of fun.i played the banana boat and jet ski. it was the first time that i drove it. and i wasnt scared at all. i drove it as if the sea is mine. all i can pictured it was you. your just like the ocean, a place that i can really let go of myself. did i ever tell you, that i like the sea very much? its like apart of me. it makes me happy. =) . besides that, i would like to tell you that i just only bought my iphone case. i really like to show it to you. but your not there. =(. lastly, i would like to say to you that i really misses you. even though, we contacted each other daily, but tonight there's this feeling of wanting to tell you. maybe i should just keep it to myself, since truthful can be really hurting sometimes. =(